chapter 117 : it's double true

i'm a blogging LOSER! no posting in over a month. lucky you! lots of things have been going on lately and will have to try and catch up sometime. lacking motivation once again, but we'll see what i start doing more of now.

been LOVING the SUNSHINE and i try to leave my house as often as possible. been trying to go to bed at the latest by 10:30. totally not tonight! been doing better at spending less overall. works best if i don't have possession of my little, blue friend, mr. Chase Visa. been feeling socially inept...what's new! been eating too much and working out WAY too little. been loving taking pictures and aching for an 85mm/1.8 lens. been trying to be more grateful, enjoying each moment and trying to YELL less. been LOVING my family and checking one more HUGE one off my list...we "adopted!" and since i am totally the type of friend that everyone has that is always complaining about $, but always spends anyway, i've been totally relishing in this :

without further ado...mr. clean finally agreed/gave into me/felt sorry that cosemtology school didn't work/is more worried about her than i am most of the time/loves me so much...

i present Miss

isn't she so stinking adorable???

cleaning up lots of this (ok, not relishing in this...) :

wasting time on (only some of the culprits) :
* the Bachelorette finale. poor Jason...my home town boy lost!
* playing zone games. got my free online Catan subscription again...oh no!
* finally reading my scriptures again and trying to do those "small" things of "great" importance.

overcoming :
* my almost entrance into cosmetology school. the direct inspiration that i can NEVER deny said, "NO! Now is not time. Maybe it will never be time. You NEED to have more faith."

i was so grateful! in that moment, i was LOVED and i knew it. although i really didn't deserve it, i received it and that was more than i could have asked for.
(Thank YOU for keeping your promises and always giving when i ask!)

more posts to come sometime in the future (distant or far).

peace out.

yours truly.

chapter 114 : slice n' dice to save our lives...

recently after another trip to Target for things we "need" and in order to save us financially, mr. clean did the following to my credit card...
he totally didn't do this behind my back, to be mean and/or abusive or out of anger, (he is so NOT any of those things) he did it because he loves me and to help our family. i honestly know that i NEEDED to do it for so long, but was holding onto how spending makes me feel...exhilarated then depressed. beside food, it has become my way to deal with stress which of course only creates more stress and i think its even harder because i rarely spend much on myself.

now we are trying to do better with only spending cash, not using the car so often and really living with our means. i know it's a good idea to listen to the Prophet and other church leaders, but i think it's definitely time we start acting on it.

yours truly.

(picture from here)

chapter 84 : it's all you

(my little tribute to his many talents. this is a cgi model that he created. it's not real, but looks amazing!)

mr. clean's birthday is tomorrow. we're getting old!
we got him some party hats, blowers and even "pin the tail on the donkey." i also got him a new lens for the rebel, but later cancelled the order. so now i guess i'm saying Happy Birthday to him by letting him enjoy World of Warcraft once again.
it really doesn't take much to make him happy.

i hope you have an amazing day and know that your girls LOVE you!

yours truly.

chapter 83 : .

today you gave me a gift
not a tangible gift, but one of
Hope.

you helped me be able to
Enjoy.
Love.
Laugh.

i truly love the way you
Love.
life and never question why you
Deserve.
such
Happiness.

in those intimate moments we spent
just being together, i
Loved.
you so much
perhaps more than i've ever allowed myself to

you make me
Happy.
you teach me to
Live.
in the moment and not regret who i am

you
Help.
me to be able to
Feel.

i
Love.
you

chapter 80 : like duh...

tonight we went out for mr. clean's birthday. can you believe it? he's going to be 28 on monday. since i graduated high school, time has continued to move at the speed of light.
sometimes the more i talk with people, the more i realize how little others actually might know me and how little i still know myself.
guess there's always tomorrow to find out more...

yours truly.

chapter 68 : help stop the addiction

(thanks mr. clean for being the model in this picture...just so you all don't think i have facial hair growing)

hi my name is brittany. (everyone say, "hi brittany.") i am a sugar addict. i'm headed down a very dangerous and unhealthy path. i eat some type of sugar many times a day. it's a big problem.
i feign sugar when i don't have it. i crave it all the time. i need to stop eating it. everything has some type of sugar in it, so i'm going to try to stop eating sugar-filled things like candy, ice cream, baked goods, pop, candy, popsicles, chocolate, candy, chocolate, ice cream, etc.
i've had this problem for so long now that i think if i actually stop i might lose like 10 lbs. within a week. it's truly a miracle that all of my teeth haven't rotted out by now.
now as a Mom who wants to teach her children healthy eating habits and provide healthy meals and relationships with food, i know it's time to do some changing for good.
i'm really scared though. i LOVE sweet things. i enjoy having a super yummy treat with friends, or just when i'm relaxing. it's going to be really hard for me...one of the hardest things i've ever done before.
now i also realize that in order to be successful in changing a habit, you have to replace it with something else. so i'm going to TRY to start drinking more water and/or working out in place of the sugar cravings. i had someone in the past tell me that they started doing this in order to quit smoking, that every time they needed to smoke, they would go work out. they stopped smoking for a long time and it also helped them get into shape.
this also means for anyone that reads this that you have to help me. no more offering me fabulous snacks, no more bringing me little treats from work, no more letting overindulge when i go out...no more SUGAR!
so off i go on this treacherous journey to face my sugary sweet demon. i'm also going to track my progress on the side to see if i can actually hold myself to it. wish me luck...

yours truly.

chapter 65 : changed by design

so here is my first attempt at blog design. in the past i have only created headers, but this time i created both the background and header. thanks to mr. clean and sjh blog design, it all came together.

let me know if you like it.

yours truly.

chapter 64 : got to get a little more out...

recently i've been sick. not just any kind of sick, but the kinds where you hack 5 times in a row until your throat is clear, sneeze three times, make your bed soaking wet because your crazy fever finally broke and blow your nose about 7 times in one try...ok maybe too much info for some of you, but i was SUPER sick.
during my worst night, while waking up for like the 16th time, i could have swore it was like 5:30 in the morning. i needed the greater part of the night to be gone and for it to be at least 5:30 am, but lo and behold, it was a mere 12:30. i had only been asleep for like 2 hours. i thought i was going to pass out, not from the balloon-head congestion (although i felt dizzy many times), but because the night wasn't even half over.
i decided it was time to put it in someone else's hands and rely on my faith to get me through. it truly was a wonderful reminder of how blessed i am to have the Priesthood so abundant in my life through mr. clean.
when the oil touched my head, my pounding headache calmed and i knew there was an end in sight.

i am also so grateful for the Holy Ghost and the subtle promptings i receive. they never fail me when i choose to follow them. a while ago, my baby K was playing and since she's started putting more things in her mouth, i try to be extra careful if there are small pieces around. this day, baby K decided to try a sticker and when i checked on her and by heeding a prompting, i could see she was chewing on something. i decided to swab her mouth and luckily i was able to remove the sticker. she definitely could have choked on it and i don't even want to think about what could have happened.

i am so grateful for the promptings that come through the Spirit and for the Priesthood. i am truly blessed.

chapter 56 : all hail the cleanliness

my husband got home late from work today and is still working now at 10:25 pm. after he came in the door, i dashed out to do some shopping. upon my return and as i set some of the bags on the counter, i noticed a distinct, chemical type smell which i couldn't place. then it hit me as i walked back toward the door...mr. clean had attempted to finish painting our entry/hallway. he would have completely succeeded, but our small pint of taupe (i like to think of it more as espresso) just wasn't enough.
to spoil me even more, he cleaned our first floor as well. he did all with our little Chubbers in tow, chronic lower back pain, a sore toe and arthritis/carpal tunnel/mr. clean's usual 500 daily illnesses that don't stop him.
who would have ever thought i deserved such sweet acts of kindness...not me that's for sure!

thank you. thank you. thank you my handsome, studly mr. clean.

chapter 55 : would you like some cream with that?

look what showed up at my house a couple days after we got home from our Christmas trip? i love this thing! nothing makes me happier than special drinks and mr. clean got me just what the doctor ordered.
all you do is pour in your milk (we don't use water here), pour in your favorite instant hot chocolate mix (i prefer Stephen's Raspberry Chocolate), push the button to on and then wait for it to do it for you. it comes out at almost the perfect temperature and you can even have froth if you want too. now i just need some super cute mugs and i'm set for a cold winter's day or any day for that fact...i've had a cup a day to get me through the last week.
so if you ever need a great pick me up, pick one of these up or let me know and i'll bring it over and it will froth your worries away too.

chapter 44 : oh happy day

tonight for my big 25 celebration, mr. clean sort-of surprised me with a dinner out without the girls. he had some of our great friends come and spend the evening with them while we went and after too. for dinner, i learned i don't like crab that much, but in a effort to go where i wanted to go he went somewhere he didn't...the crab pot. even though we didn't go for long, it was nice to have it just be us. i even got cheesecake to go, but will have to save it for later as our friends surprised me with a super yummy chocolate ice cream cake. can't go wrong there...no sir! so a HUGE thank you to everyone who made this day special for me. from emails and cards to im's and phone calls to babysitting and treats, i couldn't ask for better (unless someone can talk my husband into a puppy next year ;) ) the biggest thanks goes out to my wonderful husband for trying to surprise meand do something i want plus he got me the nicest, small digital camera on the market today (pictures of it to come in the future). thanks honey!

well on this joyous occasion, how can i not be grateful for ice cream cakes and birthdays. yum, yum, yum!

chapter 43 : being content with my job

i'm grateful that i am able to stay home each day with my girls and be their full-time Mommy. although i'm definitely not the best at cleaning, cooking or the usually wife/mom stuff, i hope that the time i spend with my family is most important. i am also grateful for my loving husband's support of me doing this. i feel like there is no other place i should be than here each day.

chapter 42 : a little each day

i'm grateful for counsel that i was given before we got married. someone told us that we should read something together each day. i can really see a difference in our marriage when we do this simple thing together.