chapter 12 : carpe diem...so to speak

while catching up on my blog stalking, i decided that i should "seize the moment" and actually put down my own thoughts instead of wasting the precious seconds i do have on other people's lives. about a month ago, i started reading "loving what is" by Byron Katie and in there she talks about being in other peoples' business. she tells about how freeing it is to only be in your business and not everyone else's. well it's so TRUE. i am constantly looking in other places beside my own life for inspiration while neglecting those moments i could be spending on my own memories and in my own business.
i get too caught up in the projects or posts people have put on the web, that i forget to pay attention to what is going on right around me in my own sphere. i think now that i can't even keep up with all i want to say, so why am i wasting so much time in other places? it's overwhelming and addicting at the same to keep delving into others' lives to see what new thing i could aspire to or spend unavailable funds on, but the simple truth is that i'm letting life pass me by all while hoping that i've captured a small piece of it in my online journal. i get so many ideas and thoughts of things that i should write so i can preserve these sweet moments with my girls, but then quickly they pass and i can't remember half of them.
i guess i could get depressed and sad about it or i can try to do better. i guess for me seizing the moment is more than what i am doing right now, it is THE PROCESS, THE JOURNEY, THE CONTINUAL BATTLE TO DO BETTER TODAY THAN YESTERDAY. i think i am on the losing side of this situation most days, but days like today remind of what is possible and that just by thinking of BECOMING BETTER and RECOGNIZING it is what is most important.