chapter 8 : guilt, unfortunately one of my companions in life

8.27.2007

i'm surrounded by GUILT at this moment. guilt because i once again ate too much at dinner, most of my dishes are piled high next to the sink, i'm not going to work out and am wasting almost $73.00 each month on fees, i am not a better wife and mother, i'm even entertaining the thought of finding a part-time job when i know it's definitely not what i should do right now, my house isn't ever clean enough, of the way i spend money, i expect too much out of people, i'm so hard to live with, i'm not doing hardly anything to help me become the person i want to be, i lose my temper too much lately, i don't live in the moment, i don't simplify my life, i want ME time, i've made mistakes in my past that i regret, i always find the negative rather than the positive in life, i spend too much time thinking "what if...", i'm never happy with my body size, i constantly make excuses for my actions, i'm so lazy, i'm always tired, i'm jealous of others, and i'm NEVER HAPPY.

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